1. Frank McCourt of course is who I mean.
2. I don't hate men. Or anyone (you know, within reason). What I mean to say: I'm done obsessing over what people think about me. I'm done being hurt by thoughtless words or actions. I've spent a long time concerned about these things and I'm tired and I'm done.
3. That bit on love sounded really arrogant and terrible. Of course I want to be completely swept off my feet. But I am starting to wonder if I am even capabale of feeling that ever. I'm certain that you fell in love and it was wonderful. Yeah. Poorly put.
In a minute I'll start posting again for real. Thanks for indulging me. :)
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Errata
Posted by Kjerstin Evans Ballard at 4:19 PM
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7 comments:
1. He's awesome. I love his books. Even Angela's Ashes. Don't hate me. :)
2. I think that sounds like a fine idea. So difficult to do though, really.
3. I didn't mean to insinuate anything about your comments. It's just that in the movie Joy makes the point that experience is what teaches you. Reading is nice, but until you've done something... I don't know. I thought your comments were just fine. :)
Are you looking forward to next week at all?
I've been thinking about what you said about love last time, though I didn't comment.
I believe thinking of love as boring is extremely useful, because in a long term relationship it is (or should be, in my opinion). Boring and reliable and dependable. You've seen "love" with lots of drama: lots of hellos and goodbyes, lots of hanging on with fingernails, lots of love-hate. That's not a good kind of love. That's an addiction to adrenalin with luke-warm affection on the side. I think there are many relationships where the partners knowingly or subconsciously create drama (by leaving, by fighting then making up etc. etc.) to FEEL something. That FEELING is the substitute for actual love.
I think long-term love is (should be) more like air or plumbing: you don't notice it until it's messed up or missing.
Not to say that R and I don't have periods of greater passion or whatever. But that's layered on top of an ultra reliable commitment.
oh rachel! i agree! the excitement fading is almost the best part! it's like being in an awesome, exclusive club with only the two of you as members. that sounds almost like comparing marriage to a club that single people are left out of, which is what Snotty Married People do. Ke, i hope you know that's not what i mean.
"Love is hard work and calm joy, I think."
I certainly hope so. At least that's what I imagine heaven to be like, and I'm all for a heavenly relationship. :)
And the most frustrating thing to me is that there are seemingly equal portions of pattern and chaos involved, or skill and luck, or something. I never know which one to lean on, you know?
(I'm glad you're posting. Hope you keep it up.)
I guess you weren't one of those people who called me a misanthrope for not caring what people thought of me.
I approve of you purging yourself of unneeded drama.
For what it's worth, I thought Angela's Ashes was a miserable book - brilliantly written, but miserable. :)
Annie: I'm starting to think that exclusion is kind of delicious. Don't feel bad.
Daine: I called you a misanthrope regardless, if I remember correctly.
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