So. I feel like I need to publish. My words make delicious pie? I'm eating it with ice cream right now.
The biggest issue is that I need to grow up and learn how to take care of myself. I know how, of course, but often make decisions that get in the way of the taking care of me. One Thursday morning when I was in the MTC I saw a very tiny looking elder eating a donut and rootbeer for breakfast and I laughed at him. How obviously just out of his parents house! Bahaha. (I was enjoying toast, cottage cheese, and mandarin oranges. As responsible as you can get on Sisco.) Moral of the story: Winterberry dear, you need to sleep.
BUT I have this theory and I think it's a breakthrough: what if there were such thing as a sleeping disorder? Not like sleep apnea or the crazy dancing legs one, (restless leg? something?), but in the same sense as eating disorders: denying oneself sleep in order to impose external order on internal turmoil? And I wouldn't be so hasty to jump to conclusions but I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who does it. In fact, I know a handful of you who are reading this post right now who know more about it than I do.
What do you think?
Anyway. Me hopped up on adrenaline, caffiene, and the Christmas treats that parents keep bringing, signing out. :)
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
I lied.
Posted by Kjerstin Evans Ballard at 7:25 AM
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8 comments:
Fall semester 2008: Katherine's inner turmoil comes back with a vengeance due to the failure of sleep deprivation and academic overachievement as coping mechanisms.
A sleep anorectic?
It's called Tylenol PM, baby. Embrace it.
I COULD sleep, I just don't. Think Christina Ricci in "Who Wants to Eat?"
I think there's also bulimic sleeping. You know, sleep four 12+ hours three days in a row, then stay up for 48 straight... yeah, been there. Especially around this time of the year. LOL.
I guess I stay up late on purpose, but it's mostly because I'm not tired. I don't fall asleep easily and I also suck at having a consistent sleep schedule so I'm always messed up. I also believe I that the whole waking up before 9am thing needs to never happen.
caffeine is for cheaters.
Also, I am doing experiments next quarter to show how sleep deprivation affects the life expectancy of flies. I would be terrified, but I don't want to live long enough to live in a nursing home anyway; why do you think I make and eat so much dessert?
p.s.-I made an egg nog cheesecake this week. If you, like me, hate the consistency of egg nog but like the flavor, I'd be happy to share the recipe.
i feel like you caught me. i'm awake right now even though my baby will be up way before i'm ready to start my day and even though i have tons to do tomorrow. but i crave this nighttime time. it's alone time...time to do whatever i want...time that doesn't have to be accounted for because it doesn't count, right? i'm addicted. i tell myself it's because i can't sleep, but you're right...it's because i don't want to.
Hmmm, I can't think of a medically diagnosable sleep disorder like that. But maybe more along the lines of a psychiatric one, though I'm no expert . . . not that I'm saying anything about you in particular-- just thought processing your description of a possible disorder.
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