Everything

There are unformed beginnings of many posts in my head right now. I think I'm going to list them willy-nilly and see if next week I can get something more cohesive down.

-a-
I feel pretty confident that the Killer's new song is a reflection on Brandon Flower's lapsed mormonism. What business of it is mine, you say? None, not at all, and I wouldn't inadvertently want to add to the mass of LDS urban legend (though I think this Elvis thing is pretty delicious), and I'm not trying to imply that everytime that everyone refers to "on my knees/looking for the answer" that it means some kind of soul-searching confessional lyric, but I do think that emblemizing the unreachable perfection that cultural mormonism seems occasionally to imply is the ideal as "dancer" ("are we human, or are we dancer?") would be literary genius. Genius I say.

-b-
I love my family. I think that A brings it out most in me, and I know Jeremy brings it out in Rachie, but we seem always to end up in lovely debates of all flavors. Last night: Presidential politics and same-sex marriage. Lovely discussions both, but the best part is arguing with my family. I get kind of uncomfortable arguing with friends: we do it all the time, but I come out arguing the conservative side and never feel sure of what I'm arguing and am always worried about social implications. With my family I rarely feel defensive and generally end up the crazy liberal one, which position I'm almost always more comfortable supporting. Odd. So fun though. There was also a moment during conference when we were all lounging on the couch, Jeremy asleep on Molly's shoulder and I felt so completely content.

-c-
I'm constantly writing notes to myself/inanitmate objects in my head. Why do I do this? Some examples from this week:

Dear Kjerstin-of-the-future,
Those brown pants you're trying on right now are a bad idea. Brown pants never work and you will certainly regret the purchase. Trust me.
Love, Kjerstin-of-the-past.

Dear basil,
Welcome to my garden! You are beautiful! I wasn't sure you'd grow and now all I can think about is caprese salads with tomatoes from Connie's.
Love, Kjerstin.

Dear Diet Coke,
Thanks for saving my life. Again. If you ever need anything, just let me know.
Love, Kjerstin.

-d-
I'm loving teaching this week. A lot. I'm finally getting it through to me that if I really work hard at something and engage in it then it's fun and I'm successful which is also fun. I have an outline for goodness' sakes (and a planner from Connie that is indescribably comforting and helpful. I'm a much less calm person if my life isn't color-coded).
But.
As I'm preaching the value of education (the longest day revolved around a less-than-successful field trip which necessitated a period-long pep talk about how these kids aren't screw-off eighth graders anymore and the only thing coming between themselves and the Ivy Leagues, or whatever else they really want to do, is them) I'm really converting myself. Like, why do we get an education at all? Not to get a better job. To be better people. I've convinced myself entirely that education is the key to making something of your life, to adding value to every second, to making people better. Also, everything you learn will help you--the more stuff you know, the more potential connections there are in your head, and what is knowledge but making connections?
On the one hand this goes even further to convince me that teaching is for sure the place for me. On the other hand, what the hell am I doing with only a bachelor's degree and one little-used language? I need to learn Spanish. I need to learn German. (Russian, French) There's so much history (particularly the history of the Israelites/Hebrew/Jews is fascinating me right now) and literature and math and chemistry that I don't know. Physics!: I haven't even touched physics.
Where do I go? (Turkey.)
What do I do?


-e-
The Gilmore Girls

-f-
Healthy/unhealthy addictions: Diet Coke vs. Ice Water, 24-hour Fitness vs. napping, Amazon.com vs. the Gilmore Girls (there is a striking similarity in the feeling you get opening a book-filled mail box and watching Dean and Rorie's first kiss. Just me?).

-g-
General Conference! Rhetorical analysis as well as practical application.